Questioner: When I face an adverse situation, whether at work or in a relationship, I realize that I’m aware of what is right or should be done, but I’m not able to do it. At the same time, I am aware of what is wrong, but cannot desist from doing it. How do I overcome this constant challenge, and how do I control my emotions and thoughts?
Sadhguru: See, whether you call somebody a lover or an enemy, both in war and love, there is an opponent. How you deal with them is different, but there is a bit of a – you can call it a tango or a battle, but there is a certain dynamic. In both, you need some skill and some capability, otherwise it won’t work.
So, this aspect of life is being dragged into all kinds of things. One fundamental reason is, whether it’s our career, or our business, or our relationships – we are trying to milk happiness out of it. The moment you attempt this, those your loved ones will slowly turn into your enemies over a period of time, because that’s how it works.
We must understand, human experience essentially comes from within us. Whether it’s pain or pleasure, it comes from within us. Joy and misery, comes from within us. Agony and ecstasy, comes from within us. If we understand this, if we take charge of this, if we take charge of the seat of experience within ourselves, what experience would we cause to ourselves? Definitely highest level of pleasantness. So, if you being joyful and loving is not enslaved to anybody, you are joyful and loving by your own nature, then every relationship will work well. Whatever sort of relationships you make, everything will work well. Whatever is your career, or your business, or your activity in the world, you will do it to the best – because there is substantial medical and scientific evidence today to show you, that only when you are in a pleasant state of experience, your body and your mind will work at their best.
For you to succeed in this physical world, this is all it takes – that you must have a few brain cells working properly and four limbs to do the things that you have to do. Without getting your body and your brains to function according to your needs, you will not be successful, you will only be successful sometimes, by default or by accident. That is not a good success, because that success creates anxiety. It’s very important, your success is rooted in your competence, your success is figured out in your mind. If this has to happen, it’s very, very important that you are in a pleasant state of experience. That is – there may be many problems and issues outside, but you are never the issue in your life. This one thing you must take care, especially because India’s safety and well-being depends on you – you should never be the issue. I know there are many issues, for everybody there are. For you, the issues are of a different nature which could threaten life, and you know, it could mean life and death, but you should never be the issue.
But right now the problem is, in most human beings’ lives, their own thoughts, their own emotions are the greatest impediments that they are facing. If you just cross this one thing, you will see every human being will be able to perform to their fullest level, find expression to their fullest level. This is the whole science of Inner Engineering – how to make sure that you are not the problem in your life, never ever I am the problem in my life. There are various situations, we will do everything to the extent we can. What works – works, what doesn’t work – does not work, but this one [self] is never the problem. This is something every human being must do. This is our mission, to make sure human beings are not tripping on their own feet.