How do I always maintain equanimity?

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Wisdom For Seekers

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Sadhguru, I have tasted many times something of the beyond, but still I get stuck in many small petty issues. How do I overcome this and always maintain equilibrium?

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How do I always maintain equanimity?

The following is an unedited transcript of Sadhguru's video. For better readability, breaks and highlights have been added by the editors.

Questioner: Sadhguru, I have tasted many times something of the beyond, but still I get stuck in many small petty issues. How do I overcome this and always maintain equilibrium?

Sadhguru: So, you have tasted the beyond, but now petty things still entangle you. So, if you have tasted it for a moment – just for one moment – there is something beyond what you think and feel. If that has become a real thing for you, even for a moment, then you must invest your life towards that.

“Yes, I’m trying to, but petty things carry me away.” So, you are little falling in love with yourself, that is why, even though the taste of the beyond is somewhere on your tongue, you still can get entangled, because you’re little becoming inflated personality. You’re little in love with yourself. “Is it wrong?” Nothing wrong – it’s just called madness.

Because love is an effort. Love is a longing to include something as a part of yourself. Love is a process, love is a possibility where you could become larger than who you are, you could become more than what you are, by inclusion. Now, if you wallow in your own self-love – now this is going against all the popular teaching – people have been telling you, “First you must love yourself before you love anybody. If you cannot love yourself, how can you love anybody?”

If you say, “I want to love myself,” now you’re heading toward schizophrenic condition

If you say, “I want to love myself,” now you’re heading toward schizophrenic condition, now you’re creating 2 in 1. If you want to ensure that you never go insane, the first and foremost step that you need to take is, you take away all divisions, and you see this [self] is an individual. An individual means, he cannot be further divided, he is indivisible, you cannot divide him anymore. This is one entity, you can’t make it into two. If you make it into two, “I love myself” now you’re heading towards madness – first step has been taken. If life situations cooperate, you will get there quick. If life situations don’t create that situation for you, you may manage within socially accepted levels of that madness.

So, the reason why even if Divine touches your tongue, even if the taste of the Divine is there on your tongue, you can still get entangled is simply self-love. It is a sure step, first step, toward madness. Whether you’re going to get there to the asylum status, or you will get only to the ashram status, is subject to many things.

This happened to a man – he wanted to enroll himself in a college. So, he saw a big building and walked in. There they had registration forms, he filled up everything. He signed, and when he went to the official to give it to be enrolled in the college, the official said, “But this is not a college, this is an asylum.” Then the man said, “But no, I wanted to join a college.” But the official said, “No, this is an asylum.” Then the man thought, “But I already filled my registration form, so what difference, I will join up. Not much difference, I will join the asylum, what’s the big difference?” The official agreed, “Yes, not much difference, but there’s one difference.” “What is it?” “Here, unless you show improvement, we won’t let you get out.”

So, ashram is just a Sanskrit word. An English word would be too insulting – so, ashram. Because with the taste of the Divine on your tongue, you’re trying, or you have the necessary foolishness in you to fall in love with something so limited, which you call as “myself.” That is a sure sign of madness. That is definitely a sure sign of madness. If you had never tasted it, then this [self] is all you know – that’s okay. Because you don’t know anything better. When the taste of the Divine is still lingering, and you’re getting entangled with something so limited as your personality, that is definitely a sign of madness, there is no question about it. If you’re in such a state of madness, you’re doomed. Even an astrologer will charge you half price, because when your destiny is so doomed, there’s nothing much to predict, you know, it’s easy. Really, it’s very easy.

Growth is possible only in reality! It’s the existential which can transcend.

But, all this talk – don’t get depressed. Should I be an optimist, or a pessimist on the spiritual path? An optimist, a pessimist, and a realist were at the breakfast table. An optimist – there was a closed pitcher, I mean a dish, a container, and the optimist looked at it and said, “Please, pass me the cream.” The pessimist looked at him and said, “Please pass me the milk.” The realist said, “Please, pass me the pitcher.” So, if you’re an optimist you will be misled. If you’re a pessimist, you’ll be misled. So, when you’re down, I ‘up’ you, when you’re up I ‘down’ you, because I want you to be a realist. Only one who is in contact with reality will grow. Others – optimists will hallucinate, pessimists will get depressed. Both will not get anywhere – you have to be a realist. You’re willing to see everything the way it is – no hype, no depression. Just the way it is – most important, extremely important.

So, when I see you in a high I put cold water on you, when I see you’re low I set fire to you – don’t think I’m playing with you. I’m just trying to bring you down to reality. You go off this way you’re going away, if you’re going this way you’re going away. We need you in reality – only in reality you grow. Growth is possible only in reality! It’s the existential which can transcend.

The psychological, whatever it does, transcendence is also empty. Transcendence is also false, in the psychological. There is no such thing as transcendence in the psychological sphere of your life. Transcendence has to be existential, because it is in the existential that your essential process of life is rooted in. What is happening in your mind, your thought and your emotion, are psychological – they are just a small offshoot of life, it’s not life. Right now, it may be keeping you fully engaged. Your thought and your emotion may be keeping you fully engaged right now, but it is just a small offshoot of life – it is not life. You can think what you want, even if you’re fast asleep, you’re still life. In fact, you’re more life when there is no psychological activity.

If the taste of the divine has come to you, then you will see, entertainment doesn’t mean anything

If you have known a few moments of what you call as beyond, those were a few moments where you were free from the psychological. Those few moments of freedom from the psychological, you are more present than ever. Years of living – a few moments where you’re free from the psychological process were the most significant moments of presence in your life. So, that little taste that you have known – you must invest your life in that direction, not what your thoughts say, not what your emotions say. Your emotions and thoughts can say whatever they want. They will say one thing today, tomorrow morning they’ll change their opinion.

They’re just like the local gossip – it keeps shifting, it keeps shifting what people are talking about today, and what they’re talking about tomorrow. Similarly in your mind, whatever your thought process is, whatever your emotional process is, is just local gossip, very localized to you. Enjoy it if it’s nice, but don’t believe it! If you like the gossip, you enjoy it – gossip is for entertainment. You don’t start your spiritual process on gossip. You don’t start anything that really matters on gossip. If the taste of the divine has come to you, then you will see, entertainment doesn’t mean anything. Suddenly, entertainment doesn’t mean anything at all to you, because all entertainment looks too stale and ridiculous for one who has tasted the real thing.

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