How to forgive someone?

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Sadhguru discusses forgiveness with Raai Laxmi, highlighting that accepting people without judgment eliminates the need for forgiveness. They explore spirituality, where Sadhguru emphasizes perceiving beyond physical and mental accumulations to experience true spiritual process. Laxmi shares her struggles with spiritual practices and expresses interest in Sadhguru's Inner Engineering program.


Duration: 6 min


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6 min read

How to forgive someone?

The following is an unedited transcript of Sadhguru's video. For better readability, breaks and highlights have been added by the editors.

Raai Laxmi: You have literally given me a complete definition and the problems and all the information about it. Another thing that I always wanted to – this is a very common issue we all have is something that – can I know one should forgive easily?

Sadhguru: Forgive whom?

Raai Laxmi: Forgiveness basically! It’s like a common issue. But… It’s hard…

Sadhguru: No no no… I know what you’re going to say. See right now, when do I have to forgive you? First thing is, I criminalize you for something. Then I am trying to forgive you. Why this problem? I don’t criminalize you, I just accept you the way you are. Where is the question of forgiveness? It’s simply complicating life.

I don’t criminalize you, I just accept you the way you are.

Raai Laxmi: But when it comes to forgiveness like when people…

Sadhguru: No but why is forgiveness needed? First of all I must criminalize you isn’t it? To forgive you. I don’t criminalize you, you do what you want with your life, why? Because that’s what you know best right now. If you knew better, you would have done better. So you are doing what you know best. Why do I have to criminalize you in my mind and then forgive you? This is unnecessary complication in life. I don’t forgive anybody because I don’t criminalize anybody.

Raai Laxmi: But it’s hard, when it comes to forgiveness it’s hard for humans basically in general so that’s why…

Sadhguru: No I’m saying forgiveness is not needed. First of all, when I don’t accuse you of anything, where is the question of forgiving you? When I accept you the way you are, whatever you are… okay?

Raai Laxmi: There is no need of forgiveness.

Sadhguru: No… I don’t care what you are, whatever you are, I’m okay with it that’s the way you are. That’s how human beings are, alright! So people get into this thing because they have unrealistic expectations out of people. Because their expectations are unrealistic, they will criminalize somebody else in their mind. And then, one day they will forgive them. Don’t play God. Accept people the way you are. You are not a perfect human being, so is nobody else around you. Accept them if you can transact with them, if you can deal with them, if you can do business with them, if you can have a relationship with them, fine! If you cannot, no! You leave them alone.

Accept people the way you are.

Raai Laxmi: Wish everyone could think like you Sadhguruji! That’s why, that makes you very different and we seek for helps and…

Sadhguru: No I’m saying you’re unnecessarily creating a complication in your mind and struggle with it forever. Because once you criminalize somebody in your mind, how much ever forgiving acting you do… It’s not going to be cleared in your mind.

Raai Laxmi: True. True. Thank you so much for this. And an other thing that I wanted to always find out or figure out has something to do with spirituality. Is there any way or a certain path that you can follow to become… or to have an awareness of… What is the way? What is the path towards spirituality if someone is trying to look for it?

Sadhguru: See… Spirituality is not an ideology of someone. It is not a set of moralities. Nor is it going to the temple, church, or mosque. Spiritual process means this, this body, you accumulated over a period of time. You were not born like this that’s what I’m saying. You slowly accumulated it. From where? From the food that we eat, alright? Whatever we accumulate, we can claim it’s ours. When we say it’s me, it’s stupid, isn’t it? It’s like saying, ”These cloths are me.” ”These cloths are mine” is okay. ”’These cloths are me” is madness, isn’t it? So, ”This body is mine” is okay. ”This is me” is madness. So, if you understand you’ve accumulated the body, you also understand, all the content of the mind you’ve accumulated. So what you see as your psychological stuff you’ve accumulated. Your physiological stuff you’ve accumulated. But what is you? That’s not yet come into experience. When that comes into experience, we call it you’re on a spiritual process.

Raai Laxmi: I find that bit a little hard, personally when it comes to me, because I’ve tried a lot of things…

Sadhguru: That’s the whole problem maybe, you’re trying a lot of things. This is like… See, if you want to strike water in this land, you must dig in one place. If you’re digging in ten different places, every two days you dig in a different place, you’ll have lot of holes, but you won’t have water.

Raai Laxmi: True. But a lot of people have advised me you know, when it comes to getting there, you have to get into doing meditation and stuff like that. I somehow, subconsciously… Even when I try being part of it, it somehow doesn’t bring me into that space of what I’ looking for.

Sadhguru: You must come and do some Inner Engineering.

Raai Laxmi: That’s what I wanted… I was coming to that. I really want to do an Inner Engineering with you, where I can figure out what the cause is.

Sadhguru: See it’s just this, if your body and your mind was taking instructions from you right now, would you keep this healthy and well? If your body was taking instructions. If your mind was taking instructions, would you keep it blissful and joyful? That’s all! You have a super computer but you don’t know where the keyboard is. This is why Inner Engineering is needed. You must find the keyboard, then you will type out what you want.

Raai Laxmi: I’m surely gonna find it very soon. Thank you Sadhgurji.

Sadhguru: Thank you.

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